In the beginning there was Nothing.  Or more accurately, before the beginning there was Nothing, because when there is Nothing, then only Nothing can begin.

Before the beginning there was Nothing.  And the Nothingness was calm and content.  In the Nothingness was the vastness of time.   And with the vastness of time, the Nothingness grew exceedingly bored.   (“Exceedingly” being used somewhat inaccurately since at this time there is only Nothing to “exceed.”)  And from the boredom came an idea.  And the Nothingness decided to create Something to alleviate the boredom.  

And from the Nothingness came Something.  And the Nothingness named it “Adom.”  And in return Adom named the Nothingness “Gawd.”

And unto Adom, Gawd said “I have created you in my own image.  Go forth and multiply.”  To which replied Adom, “But you were Nothing before you created me.  If I am Something, then how can I be created in the image of Nothing?”  To this Gawd replied, “Stop being such a wiseass and do as you’re told.”

And thus It began.